I started with a question, “Am I wasting my time?” and then, on the face of it, appeared to answer it in the image.
As you all know, I have been writing a blog now for nearly three years, every week.
Every single week I try to come up with something that might be of interest, might help some folks, or might offer a perspective that perhaps had not been previously considered.
A HEAVY FALL
I started this process (the blogging aspect) in a hope that it might be a useful point of reference for people suffering with mental health issues. I have often asked myself “what’s the point?”
The answer I have come up with in previous times is that if this blog helps just one person then that’s good enough. Now, however, I AM NOT SURE IT IS.
The amount of feedback that I have had on circa 150 blogs is probably, in total, about 20 comments. That does not necessarily mean this process is not helping others, but truth be told, I really have to wonder.
I recently asked a really good friend of mine if they would consider doing a blog for Jacob and the answer was no. On further discussion it became apparent that my friend (of far greater intelligence than I) felt that She would have nothing to share with the world, on the subject of mental health that would not sound “facile”.
I then began to wonder, is most of the stuff I have written “facile”?
(Facile defined on Google is: simplistic, superficial, over simple)
So the discussion, continued, where, internally, I examined my own reason for blogging in particular.
We did discuss the “reason I write” and yes my poetry is therapeutic, but the blogging aspect is done with the hope of offering some kind of free support to folks. It’s not an easy task; it’s an arduous and unrelenting ticking time bomb, to come up with something to say week after week.
And, I think it’s probably fairly accurate to say that I’m really not very good at it.
This is not a vain attempt, meant to garner pity.
I very loosely regard myself as a writer, and some of my poetry has some creativity in it, and even if it didn’t I would carry on, because this abstract writing is cathartic.
But the blogging (?)
Is it facile and largely useless or insignificant, for the most part (?)
Based on the statistics of the feedback that I’ve received over three years or thereabouts totalling about 20 in number, I have to conclude that the time I am spending trying to create a resource for people with mental illness, is probably completely useless and wasted.
I don’t intend to make any rash decisions (as is often my way) I will ponder on this for a while and share these thoughts with a few people close to me and see what they think.
I would however be grateful for any comments from anybody reading this. If you have people in your life, for which this is a focal point of assistance then I would be extremely grateful to hear from you.
As I write, with my companion by my side, I am reminded of the philosophy that, once you have tried as much as you can, if something is meant to be it will, if it’s not it won’t.
There’s an element of peace in this realisation.
So, with the future of this blog, and its usefulness or not, I hand it over to you.
With Love, peace and acceptance I am…..