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While in Chiang Mai and having been awake for 3 hours, (from 5am) and becoming more

desperate for a caffeine fix, I jumped into my car but could find NO WHERE to satisfy my crazy


In disbelief I thought there MUST be somewhere.  My “inner voice” was assuring me “just around the next corner”!!!!

At last I found sanctuary in a coffee shop.  As I walked in, I greedily “inhaled” the coffee almost by osmosis!!!!

My shaking eased, as I ordered a second coffee, and my panic disappeared, knowing I had an “intravenous” supply of caffeine coursing its way through my “deprived” veins!!!
This led me to thinking about the duplicity of this western state of mind, to the parallel of mental health.

You see, the disease of depression can flare up or be worsened by a “deprivation” of many different kinds.
It might be the loss of love, grieving for a loved one who has passed, grieving for a lifestyle that you once had, the questionable gift of continued stress, unfamiliarity and even the actual worry about impending change.

The latter, change, is something that we all deal with in different ways.  Some of us cope well with change, excited by the prospect of experiences a new.  Others are consumed with their fear of their perceived potential of dangers and are scared that they will be unable to cope.

Through my 50 odd years (there’s duplicity in my deliberate use of the word “odd”!!!), I have found the more I subject myself to change and new challenges the more I understand

myself.  Don’t misunderstand me, I will only EVER be a work in progress, learning each day,

trying to keep my “gob shut”.  And use my ears more!!! (Just one of an increasing pile of

“awarenesses” which I am tuned into at the moment).

I suppose the summation of this rather short blog, is that, if you are in the clutches of darkness, do yourself a favour, burn a candle to bring just a tiny living light.

Once again there is duplicity.  I have been so low and paralysed by depression in the past that the only company I could stand would actually be a candle.  But on a more philosophical level your “candle” may be a short walk, a call to a neighbour, helping someone with a particular chore or problem of their own, for in helping others you are granted the most precious gift…….WORTH.

And when all else fails, put the kettle on and ask someone round for a coffee !!!!

With love, peace, hope and blessings…….whatever your faith or philosophy.

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